Monday, April 16, 2012
What makes life worth it
I've been thinking about this phrase, "makes life worth it" does this imply that the majority of life is crap? and that there are only a few (far in between) things that make going through all that crap worth it? if that is the case than that sucks, why do we make life so freaking hard? should it not be the other way around, "things that make life not worth it" ? feeling all googley, I search and guess who has an article about it "psychology today" what makes life worth living.... give me a second to read it.... "Here are some possible answers to the question of what makes life worth living: (1) nothing; (2) religion; (3) happiness; (4) love, work, and play. Evidence from psychology and neuroscience supports the fourth answer." hmmmm.... that was just the first sentence, for me i work two jobs, i play little, and love, well not so sure that exists although i do suspend disbelief on a daily basis, now anxiety about "loved ones" well i guess that answers my question, those who I love, are those who i worry about. "You can have happiness without much meaning, and meaning without much happiness; so happiness is not the meaning of life." hmmm, so does that mean that finding what makes life worth it is the meaning of life, the goal, like old whats his face "samuel johnson" and the whole idea that the path to happiness is not about the destination but the path itself, that it is the search of happiness that is the happiness, that as long as you are working towards some sort of goal and it doesnt matter what that goal is, then you will feel as if you life has meaning, and that if you should attain said goal you should find a new one, because only in the quest can you be happy. that is true for me, i am most depressed when i have no goal, when i am not working on a novel, or getting another useless college degree or moving, or anything else of significance. so, if you have read the above mentioned article then you will see that he came to about the same conclusion as i did... which btw was not a new idea i just had.... wrote a whole stupid paper on it years ago.... so back to the question what makes my life worth living.... monkeys, babies, books, movies,... when does live not seem worth it? maybe just about anytime i'm not in the middle of reading a really good book.... so my answer books make life worth it. still seems like we spend a lot more time on the things that don't make life worth it, like work, obsessions, depressions, cleaning house.
Friday, January 6, 2012
so.. no particular reason for this blog
I'm mostly writing this blog so that my last blog isn't the one that everyone sees on all the pages I have connected to it. I don't really have a reason. But tonight I have been thinking about the German word for bully, on the German amazon page for my book, the category that my book is listed under is MOBBING, now is that not a perfect word for bullying, I mean seriously if I am walking down a deserted street and I see a group of teenage boys, I am more afraid than if I were to see just one, and why is that? Because of MOB mentality, I don't trust mobs, mobs are who gang up and bully others, the ones in school who as a group tortured those of us who were not apart of their mob. Years ago in one of my psychology classes I began thinking about the idea of "us versus them" people are more comfortable when they can divide the population into enemies and friends. That if someone is different then they are apart of the "other group" and that they should be destroyed, I guess this scares me as I have always been one of those others, and try to see people as individuals instead of as groups, although that is hard during christmas time working at the mall :), hmmm maybe that is why I don't like large groups of people. Anyways, mobbing what an interesting term.
In other news, I have both of my books listed for free on Amazon through Saturday, tomorrow for those of you who have lost track of what day it is, and the first day up the books did really well over 1000 downloads the first day, things have slowed down since then, which kinda worries me about who is downloading the books, are they actual readers or serial book downloaders, that just because a book is free that they should get a copy, that makes no sense to me, but honestly there seems a shortage of GOOD books to get for free, maybe I missed the peak and everybody already posted their books for free, or just maybe not that many people were willing to give exclusive rights in order to have their books in the program, we will see how it turns out. either way, whether people read them or not, there are now 1693 copies of my novel in existence.
1693 copies and I still feel the same as I did with 350 last month, I wonder at what point I will feel accomplished, maybe it is when I have more than two reviews on amazon, or maybe never, maybe I will see millions and still worry about whether anyone wants to read my books.
So I had little to say and ended up saying alot, that's the thing about writing, hard to get motivated to get started but when you do, it really isn't that hard.
In other news, I have both of my books listed for free on Amazon through Saturday, tomorrow for those of you who have lost track of what day it is, and the first day up the books did really well over 1000 downloads the first day, things have slowed down since then, which kinda worries me about who is downloading the books, are they actual readers or serial book downloaders, that just because a book is free that they should get a copy, that makes no sense to me, but honestly there seems a shortage of GOOD books to get for free, maybe I missed the peak and everybody already posted their books for free, or just maybe not that many people were willing to give exclusive rights in order to have their books in the program, we will see how it turns out. either way, whether people read them or not, there are now 1693 copies of my novel in existence.
1693 copies and I still feel the same as I did with 350 last month, I wonder at what point I will feel accomplished, maybe it is when I have more than two reviews on amazon, or maybe never, maybe I will see millions and still worry about whether anyone wants to read my books.
So I had little to say and ended up saying alot, that's the thing about writing, hard to get motivated to get started but when you do, it really isn't that hard.
Friday, October 28, 2011
REVIEWS :)
CUTTING CLASS
Goodreads freebie. This story was filled with tragic figures. First, we have Johnny Boy. Johnny's mother is the school librarian, who is known to all to be a whore. She was raped as a young girl by her own father. Johnny's father, unbeknownst to him, is his grandfather. His mother has protected him from this info by telling him his father was a soldier who died in Afghanistan. The father/grandfather, in addition to being a pedophile, was also an arsonist. While in prison for arson, he killed himself by setting himself on fire. This is more info Johnny Boy's mother has not shared with him. It is somewhat hard to believe that in a small town Johnny doesn't here about his grandfather from others. The story is partly told through the journal Johnny Boy's mother kept while she was in high school. I particularly liked these journal entries. They were so full of the extremes and drama typical of a teenage girl. I smiled while reading them, it was so easy to see this girl full of romantic dreams. Johnny Boy has spent 17 years in prison for arson and murder. It is not 'til the end of the book, that the reader learns the truth about the fire.
The main characters in the present time are Pony Boy (child of Johnny Boy) and a girl he goes to high school with, Pixie. Pony Boy is an angry boy, who grew up without knowing his father at all. While he did know about his father, his mother never brough in to prison to visit his father, until the week before his father was released form prison. His mother finally introduced father and son because she is dying of breast cancer. Pony Boy is seventeen. Pixie is the daughter of Meghan, another tragic figure. Meghan was a beautiful girl in high school, popular, a cheer leader. Meghan survived the fire that killed her boyfriend Ducky. She was pregnant with Pixie (birth name Calliope) at the time. She suffered major burns. Her response to this was to become a drinker. She has been married and divorced six times and spends her nights with an endless series of lovers. She pays little attention to her daughter. Pixie and Pony Boy are in the early stages of a relationship, when PB's father gets out of jail. The two stories are told alternately, with both building toward a crescendo. This is where we learn the true story of the fire Johnny Boy went to jail for. We also learn how Pony Boy will deal with everything going on in his life; his budding relationship with Pixie, his mother's dying, and his father's new role in his life.
This was a book full of lost souls. I was rooting for them to find their way.
The main characters in the present time are Pony Boy (child of Johnny Boy) and a girl he goes to high school with, Pixie. Pony Boy is an angry boy, who grew up without knowing his father at all. While he did know about his father, his mother never brough in to prison to visit his father, until the week before his father was released form prison. His mother finally introduced father and son because she is dying of breast cancer. Pony Boy is seventeen. Pixie is the daughter of Meghan, another tragic figure. Meghan was a beautiful girl in high school, popular, a cheer leader. Meghan survived the fire that killed her boyfriend Ducky. She was pregnant with Pixie (birth name Calliope) at the time. She suffered major burns. Her response to this was to become a drinker. She has been married and divorced six times and spends her nights with an endless series of lovers. She pays little attention to her daughter. Pixie and Pony Boy are in the early stages of a relationship, when PB's father gets out of jail. The two stories are told alternately, with both building toward a crescendo. This is where we learn the true story of the fire Johnny Boy went to jail for. We also learn how Pony Boy will deal with everything going on in his life; his budding relationship with Pixie, his mother's dying, and his father's new role in his life.
This was a book full of lost souls. I was rooting for them to find their way.
I won this book in a Goodreads First Reads giveaway.
I believe that this book was an advance copy, explaining the grammatical errors (incorrect words in place of the right ones, i.e. too instead of to), which was a little distracting for someone like me (I'm a teacher and those kind of things drive me crazy), but that's not relevant.
The basic premise and story line is good, but the way things tended to bounce around was distracting from the story. There was continual change in the point of view and topics, sometimes making it difficult to remember who was speaking and about what. The bold face entries made it clear when P.B.'s mom is writing about her high school experience and romance with P.B's father Johnny, but the parts of the book written in the present day were constantly changing point of views, which took away from the story.
I enjoyed the premise and story, but the way it was told kind of turned me off to it. I think if the storytelling was improved, it would make a world of difference.
Thank you for the chance to read it though!
I believe that this book was an advance copy, explaining the grammatical errors (incorrect words in place of the right ones, i.e. too instead of to), which was a little distracting for someone like me (I'm a teacher and those kind of things drive me crazy), but that's not relevant.
The basic premise and story line is good, but the way things tended to bounce around was distracting from the story. There was continual change in the point of view and topics, sometimes making it difficult to remember who was speaking and about what. The bold face entries made it clear when P.B.'s mom is writing about her high school experience and romance with P.B's father Johnny, but the parts of the book written in the present day were constantly changing point of views, which took away from the story.
I enjoyed the premise and story, but the way it was told kind of turned me off to it. I think if the storytelling was improved, it would make a world of difference.
Thank you for the chance to read it though!
So, once again I will break the moral code and write my own review just like I did for Sentimental Bulls#*t.
Half the novel is about Johnny who doesn't talk to many people, so when he taps the shoulder of a girl in math class and asks her "Do you like monkeys?" it is a big deal. Johnny's home life sucks and all he wants is to stay out of trouble, and yet, he keeps finding himself with fighting the captain of the school football team, who used to be his best friend. The girl Johnny likes, carries around a worn copy of the Outsiders, and Johnny can't help but hide his new relationship with her.
The second part of the book is about P.B. (named after PonyBoy from the Outsiders), I wonder who his parents are?
Half the novel is about Johnny who doesn't talk to many people, so when he taps the shoulder of a girl in math class and asks her "Do you like monkeys?" it is a big deal. Johnny's home life sucks and all he wants is to stay out of trouble, and yet, he keeps finding himself with fighting the captain of the school football team, who used to be his best friend. The girl Johnny likes, carries around a worn copy of the Outsiders, and Johnny can't help but hide his new relationship with her.
The second part of the book is about P.B. (named after PonyBoy from the Outsiders), I wonder who his parents are?
I won this book as part of a Goodreads First-Reads contest.
To be honest, it did take me a while to get into this book. The viewpoint kept jumping around, and it took me a few chapters to understand the different relationships. It also started off sounding like another one of those angry teenager stories, but towards the middle there were some twists that I did not expect, and in the end, I ended up really liking the book and it was something unique.
To be honest, it did take me a while to get into this book. The viewpoint kept jumping around, and it took me a few chapters to understand the different relationships. It also started off sounding like another one of those angry teenager stories, but towards the middle there were some twists that I did not expect, and in the end, I ended up really liking the book and it was something unique.
I love books about teens on the edge and a little messed up. The story about the parents, fascinating.
The character development is admirable and it makes you wonder what is going on in the mind of the author that would inspire this story.
The character development is admirable and it makes you wonder what is going on in the mind of the author that would inspire this story.
Well this book is definitely an interesting read. Before i comment on the story though i just want to say that there was a lot of typos. The story is completely different to anything i expected, in a good way. What happens surprises you and its believable and intensely emotional. You feel connected to the characters and the story reads well although it is a little confusing sometimes. Overall i enjoyed it immensely and would recommend it as its not the usual sappy love story written for the YA group.
SENTIMENTAL BULLS#*T
So, I'm sure it is very wrong to review your own book and if this were amazon it would delete my review... but let us see if I can get away with it here.
I think that Sentimental Bulls#*t is different than most of the books out there. I'm sure everyone says that about their book, but I'm sure mine is, and that is why Sentimental Bulls#*t is not for everyone.
The book starts out with Rose who is about to leave home to go to art school in New York City, where she thought she dreamed of going, but things have changed since she applied.
Rose's best friend Shade came home for Christmas Vacation and Rose couldn't have been more excited but then somehow they end up spending less time together than Rose anticipated and Rose begins spending more time with Patrick, Shade's recent ex.
Sure the same old group of friends still goes places together, but things have changed and Rose finds herself exiled from the group.
Which finds her in New York where she meets the cutest boy she has ever dared talk to Dysan.
The story alternates between her present with Dysan and her past with Shade and Patrick, until she must choose whether to stay in the past with her memories or move forward in her relationship with Dysan and New York City. Magenta Periwinkle(less)
I think that Sentimental Bulls#*t is different than most of the books out there. I'm sure everyone says that about their book, but I'm sure mine is, and that is why Sentimental Bulls#*t is not for everyone.
The book starts out with Rose who is about to leave home to go to art school in New York City, where she thought she dreamed of going, but things have changed since she applied.
Rose's best friend Shade came home for Christmas Vacation and Rose couldn't have been more excited but then somehow they end up spending less time together than Rose anticipated and Rose begins spending more time with Patrick, Shade's recent ex.
Sure the same old group of friends still goes places together, but things have changed and Rose finds herself exiled from the group.
Which finds her in New York where she meets the cutest boy she has ever dared talk to Dysan.
The story alternates between her present with Dysan and her past with Shade and Patrick, until she must choose whether to stay in the past with her memories or move forward in her relationship with Dysan and New York City. Magenta Periwinkle(less)
Apr 26, 2011
Linda Thao marked it as to-read I can't wait to read this book!!
After days of reading, I realized this book has great potential to be something special, unique, or in it's own way a classic. I believe the author has her own voice and opinions, Which she gladly displayed in the story. Though, I did find it at times average, I still believe that this book has the potential to be more then it is. I love the title(it's eye-catching) the cover is amazing and original, and the characters don't feel like your average, dull, ordinary, generic cast. Thank you so much good reads for allowing me to win this book and I hope to read more from the author and see her grow and change in her writing. If I could give this book a grade I'd say it was worthy of a 3.5/5 ^___^. (less)
I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.
I Loved this book!! The author, Magenta Periwinkle, did an amazing job conveying the often conflicted thoughts and feelings of youth. Within the pages of this book are opportunities to completely submerse yourself in the memories of your own relationships with people that have since become a fixture of your past. Thank you for the chance to re-examine:
- The bond of a childhood friendship, that you will never find again.
- A betrayal so great, you will forever feel unresolved.
- The feelings of complete emptiness you feel when losing someone you love so dearly.
- And Mostly, for the strength to realize that life will go on!
I highly recommend this book to everyone who has struggled with the choices of life. (less)
- The bond of a childhood friendship, that you will never find again.
- A betrayal so great, you will forever feel unresolved.
- The feelings of complete emptiness you feel when losing someone you love so dearly.
- And Mostly, for the strength to realize that life will go on!
I highly recommend this book to everyone who has struggled with the choices of life. (less)
One question:
Why isn't the Converse on the cover purple?!?!?!
Why isn't the Converse on the cover purple?!?!?!
I won this from this from Goodreads. Can't wait to read this!
This book definitely keeps you guessing. I wanted to know what was going to happen next. Quite a few grammar mistakes. Very good read.
Magenta Periwinkle is the pseudonym for Keli Chaffin lives in Texas with her three cats and hopes to someday own a monkey. Keli has two useless bachelor's degrees, one in Photography and one in Psychology. She works in a psychologist office and thinks she has some idea about the workings of the human psyche.
More about Magenta Periwinkle... Friday, April 29, 2011
A Companion of Sentimental Bulls#*t.
Sentimental Companion now available as a Wikipedia book. This is a compilation of Wikipedia articles on the famous suicides that I used as the chapter titles in my book Sentimental Bulls#*t.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Diane Arbus- photographer, barbituates and slit wrists
So,
It has been a while since I wrote the first installation of my explaining the chapter headings in Sentimental Bulls#*t which is now available on both amazon and barnes and noble (bn having been a shock to me that it was on there since I had not taken the steps to put it there).
So, this is the blog about Diane Arbus and what I may or may not correctly remember about her. I should probably google her before writing, but that seems like cheating. I think she was the same photographer who was portrayed in a movie along with that british guy who was arrested several years back with the prostitute, and in this movie he is covered from head to two with hair, and he is clogging up the drains in the building complex each time he takes a shower. I think Diane is portrayed by that blood lady who was married to Tom Cruise, whose name I forget but I only liked her in that one movie with Tom where they are out westish, FAR and AWAY, I liked Tom in that too, might have been the last time I liked him in a movie besides the wonderful TOP GUN where he convinced me that he was in love with the female lead when really it was just the sound track that made the love look real. So back to Diane, she was a photographer and she swallowed a bunch of pills and killed her self. let me double check this on wiki...
That's right she took the cool pictures that looked like people in the circus. The movie I mentioned above was called FUR and starred Nicole Kiddman. I did just find out or refind out that she was depressed (duh) and that her body was not found for two days, as she lay dead in a bath tub. disturbing.
http://www.amazon.com/Sentimental-Bulls-t-ebook/dp/B004PLNNJ0
It has been a while since I wrote the first installation of my explaining the chapter headings in Sentimental Bulls#*t which is now available on both amazon and barnes and noble (bn having been a shock to me that it was on there since I had not taken the steps to put it there).
So, this is the blog about Diane Arbus and what I may or may not correctly remember about her. I should probably google her before writing, but that seems like cheating. I think she was the same photographer who was portrayed in a movie along with that british guy who was arrested several years back with the prostitute, and in this movie he is covered from head to two with hair, and he is clogging up the drains in the building complex each time he takes a shower. I think Diane is portrayed by that blood lady who was married to Tom Cruise, whose name I forget but I only liked her in that one movie with Tom where they are out westish, FAR and AWAY, I liked Tom in that too, might have been the last time I liked him in a movie besides the wonderful TOP GUN where he convinced me that he was in love with the female lead when really it was just the sound track that made the love look real. So back to Diane, she was a photographer and she swallowed a bunch of pills and killed her self. let me double check this on wiki...
That's right she took the cool pictures that looked like people in the circus. The movie I mentioned above was called FUR and starred Nicole Kiddman. I did just find out or refind out that she was depressed (duh) and that her body was not found for two days, as she lay dead in a bath tub. disturbing.
http://www.amazon.com/Sentimental-Bulls-t-ebook/dp/B004PLNNJ0
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Those Who Favor Fire: to be renamed
So,
It appears that the title "Those Who Favor Fire" has already been used for a novel and thus I am going to use this as a good excuse to rename my second novel. Previously known as .... is a novel about a boy "P.B." who is the star of his high school football team and yet he doesn't quite fit in, he has blue spikes to his hair, he likes the most unpopular girl named Pixie (who is rumored to be the school slut) and most of all he is disproportionately angrier than the other members of the team. P.B. thinks his anger may be the direct result of growing up without a father, as his father is in prison for burning down the local high school when he was the same age as P.B. . When his father is released from prison and his mother's high school journal resurfaces, P.B. must come to terms with what really happened the night the school burnt down.
So, what should I rename it?
"What really happened the night the school burnt down"
"One of those books that should be burned"
"Book burning"
"Biblioclasm "
"Libricide"
"A modern day book buring"
"to be burned unread"
"Girl name unknown"
"obsessed with hitler"
"pictures taken in a graveyard"
It appears that the title "Those Who Favor Fire" has already been used for a novel and thus I am going to use this as a good excuse to rename my second novel. Previously known as .... is a novel about a boy "P.B." who is the star of his high school football team and yet he doesn't quite fit in, he has blue spikes to his hair, he likes the most unpopular girl named Pixie (who is rumored to be the school slut) and most of all he is disproportionately angrier than the other members of the team. P.B. thinks his anger may be the direct result of growing up without a father, as his father is in prison for burning down the local high school when he was the same age as P.B. . When his father is released from prison and his mother's high school journal resurfaces, P.B. must come to terms with what really happened the night the school burnt down.
So, what should I rename it?
"What really happened the night the school burnt down"
"One of those books that should be burned"
"Book burning"
"Biblioclasm "
"Libricide"
"A modern day book buring"
"to be burned unread"
"Girl name unknown"
"obsessed with hitler"
"pictures taken in a graveyard"
Friday, April 1, 2011
Books selling
It is so surreal to think that there are actually people out there who I don't know who I will probably never know, who are reading my novel. What is even stranger is I might never even know what they thought of it, or even if they liked it, if it changed their lives even for just a second. Today I was regretting using the words "save a life" in my book description about how a good book can save a life. I hope that my reference is not taken as in the religious connotation of the word "Saved" as that is so far from how I meant it. What I mean is that feeling, when deep in depression when you go to the book store looking for a book to save your life, a book that can distract you for the next few hours or days, and give you a world where you feel so connected that the real world disappears. When I read I don't see the words, they disappear, and I become so caught up in the story that I forget my own problems, and some how see the world as a hopefully place. A novel can be just as powerful as therapy or an antidepressant pill. A novel can remind you that "true love exists," can remind you of all the Edwards of the world not that I think Twilight is the best example of love, but the options are endless. My only hope is that someday someone can see Dysan and think, gee I wish he was mine.
http://amzn.com/B004PLNNJ0
http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4678909.Magenta_Periwinkle
http://amzn.com/B004PLNNJ0
http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4678909.Magenta_Periwinkle
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)